This Unicorn Kisses Jar is the perfect topic to kick off Monday morning! It just screams fun… and who doesn’t need some extra fun on Monday?! My last few Rocking Motherhood Mondays have focused on learning activities to do with your little ones, so I decided this Monday I would talk about guiding our littles ones’ behaviors with positive discipline. Before getting into the details of the Unicorn Kisses Jar, I thought it was important to clarify what positive discipline is and how we can practice it with our children.
“Positive Discipline is a program developed by Dr. Jane Nelsen. It is based on the work of Alfred Adler and Rudolf Dreikurs and designed to teach young people to become responsible, respectful and resourceful members of their communities. Positive Discipline teaches important social and life skills in a manner that is deeply respectful and encouraging for both children and adults (including parents, teachers, childcare providers, youth workers, and others).
Recent research tells us that children are hardwired from birth to connect with others, and that children who feel a sense of connection to their community, family, and school are less likely to misbehave. To be successful, contributing members of their community, children must learn necessary social and life skills. Positive Discipline is based on the understanding that discipline must be taught and that discipline teaches,” (https://www.positivediscipline.com/about-positive-discipline).
What is a Unicorn Kisses Jar?
With Miss Sassy Pants getting older, we decided it was time to start working on guiding her behaviors in a positive way. We wanted to teach her to be accountable for her behavior and the consequences associated with that behavior. We decided a behavior jar was the perfect option for her age. Generally, you fill a “behavior jar” as you catch your child behaving as desired. Though my kiddo would think this alone was fun, we decided to take it one step further to really encourage and help her connect with the concept (her age is a huge factor). Hence, the Unicorn Kisses Jar was born!
Our kiddo is obsessed with unicorns, pink, and anything pretend. Her imagination sees no limits. Instead of a simple jar that we track her behavior with, we decided to get a jar with pretty glass stones and call them “unicorn kisses.” We then discussed how she could earn unicorn kisses. We did keep it simple because of her age, but we still covered the basics. Right from wrong, using our words, keeping our hands to ourselves, being kind to others (and what that means… using examples), and following directions. We also discussed how her dad and I model these behaviors, and that if she had questions or needed help, to ask us. Again, this is really where you need to personalize this for your child.
We then discussed rewards for her good behavior. We ended up with a total of six rewards (this number doesn’t mean anything… it’s all I had room for on the glass jar I bought). Here is our list:
- Go to the store and buy a new book
- Ice cream treat with the family
- 10 Minutes extra bath play time
- Pick what’s for dinner
- Pick a family activity
- Get a toy at the store
Tips and Tricks for Success
- Customize the jar to something your child likes or enjoys. Unicorn kisses work for Miss Sassy Pants, but I feel that might not be the case for all kiddos.
- Be consistent.
- Give the unicorn kiss immediately after the desired behavior is demonstrated.
- Allow your child to pick out the unicorn kiss and put it in the behavior jar.
- Don’t take away stones for bad behavior… positive jar for positive behaviors.
- Be a cheerleader for your kiddo!
I hope you liked today’s installment of Rocking Motherhood Mondays! We have had great success with it and wanted to share the idea to help other parents and educators. Please feel free to leave a comment below!
Cheers to Unicorn Kisses!